The response to the naked truth videos has been overwhelmingly positive. I’m still trying to process what that means.
I wrote in earlier posts that maybe I was already the new me that the old me was craving to become. I still think that’s true, but retroactively, not anticipatedly. Change cannot be declared, it doesn’t happen in a statement. You’re still the old you as you start doing the work, the gritty dirty step by step work of changing. It’s only after that, when you brush off the sweat and blood and tears off your face, that you realize that you are now the new you to the old you that was there when you started off.
So right now I’m acknowledging that I am a new me to the old me that didn’t use to make videos of herself, and an even newer me to the one that was too spooked to upload them.
But again I feel like I am facing a new threshold, a new need for growth, and as much as I want to declare myself through the door, I can’t do that. I have to tie my shoelaces and start walking to it.
But first, tonight, I’m going to rest for a sec and celebrate the road that has been traveled. I’m going to celebrate the fact that I am creative enough, beautiful enough, daring enough, and truthful enough, to be actually standing right here right now.