I tracked down the article on Marsha M. Linehan and radical acceptance:
Expert on Mental Illness Reveals Her Own Fight
By Benedict Carey
Withholding love is not the way to solve suffering. Being harsh on yourself does not drive positive change, it causes pain. And pain sucks, and pain kills.
I am still trying to accept myself unconditionally. It’s a damn hard practice. But a worthy one. I want to remember to choose the carrot, not the stick. I’ve already hurt myself so much. The time to love myself has come.
This article was one of my first exposure to these ideas. I am so grateful it landed on my path when it did. The date published tells me I read this 6 years ago. At the time, I felt like I didn’t know how to live, and I wanted to die every day. If I look at me now, I see how much I’ve changed. I credit this to having learned how to be loving to myself. And I know, this is how I want to continue…
That article was intriguing. I’m sorry, I read this post earlier but was not in a position to comment. As you and I have discussed before its hard for me to realize what the pain is. What it feels like. How it consumes/consumed you. But I know I am grateful to read your words that feel like a discovery for all. Which is a good thing.
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Pain is a difficult subject. And it can’t be solved, which makes for frustrating conversations. Yet pain that hasn’t been witnessed lingers on, it begs to be discovered. Sunshine on darkness, that’s the antidote.
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Sunshine on darkness…just beautiful Rain
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